Chaos ensues at the Whiskey Kick HQ today as our Captain and Co-Captain have been KIDNAPPED!!! Sometime around 4am PST the most adorablest dog in the world, Crosby, activated the Whiskey Kick Emergency Broadcast System. This signals all past and current members of Whiskey Kick that a Whiskey Kicker is in danger, or that the world in general is in danger and only Whiskey Kick can help.
Without missing a beat all Whiskey Kickers answered the call and were at our HQ within minutes. What we found there, besides that crazy cute scamp Crosby, was a note:
“Your precious leaders are now ours. Do not attempt to win any games. Do not attempt to submit any recaps. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO RESCUE THEM!!!”
There was no signature, we’ve combed the area and found no real evidence. Then that incredibly good dog Crosby opened his maw and showed us part of a shirt…a pepto bismol colored shirt. Entering the information into the Whiskey-tron 10000 it spit out information we already knew. Juan Ponciano was our man. It made perfect sense, he’s notorious for stealing from Whiskey Kick. Why wouldn’t he try to steal away our Nobel prize leadership. We immediately started gearing up and warming up the Whiskey Tank. We were getting ready to leave when Ryan Adams, the moral compass of Whiskey Kick, offered this piece of advice:
“Listen, let’s not jump the gun. This could be one big set-up by Westside for Life. Sure it probably is Juan but let’s flush out our prey and make them reveal themselves to us.”
So after a bit of brainstorming we’ve decided to hold a candle light vigil for the safe return of Kellen and Mallory. It will take place directly after our 9pm game Wednesday August 31st. That’s right kidnappers…AFTER OUR GAME!!! We’re going to still play Westside on Hiatus because that’s what Mal and Kel would want us to do. We may lose the game but you mister kidnaps people cause you’re a big jerk, you sir will never win.
No comments:
Post a Comment